For the most part, I've come to accept my beard. Sometimes, I'm thankful for it. Thankful for what it teaches me about God, thankful for the people it brings across my path, thankful for the oh-so-stellar way it builds character in me.
But today, the little surge of beard anger that crops up periodically reared its ugly head. I got mad. At God. Who hasn't taken away my beard. Yet.
I whined to Him about it. "Why do I have to deal with this? Why haven't You taken it away? I feel so ugly and hairy. Why are You doing this to me?" (Everything is God's fault, see.)
Then it occurred to me that today is my day to write about my beard. I thought, "Oh, great. What am I going to say? That I hate it and I'm cranky about it? That'll make a nice, encouraging post. I'll really focus on God's love with that one. How can I talk about beauty in Christ when I feel so ugly?"
But my questions were my answers. God's love. Beauty in Christ. These blessings are mine in spite of my beard. God loves me no matter how hairy I am, and He finds me beautiful because of the grace He has adorned me with in Christ.
Remembering these iron-clad facts calmed my heart. And then God whispered, "Do you trust Me?"
I knew what He was asking. Do I trust Him with my beard. Do I believe His allowing my beard is part of His plan. Do I believe He's using it for good.
Well, do I?
How many women have days like I did today? How many women despair because they feel ugly? How many women cover their bodies, hiding shame they think everyone can see?
And how many of those women know that God loves them? How many know that Christ died for them and took their shame? How many know that on those "I feel ugly" days, God is hugging them, holding them, and whispering to their hearts, "My daughter, You are beautiful to Me."
If I can reach just one woman and share with her that she is beautiful to God, then my beard is worth it.
Yes, Abba, I trust You with my beard.
"The King is enthralled by your beauty; honor Him, for He is your Lord."